Schloer. I’ve never really seen myself as a ‘alternatives to wine’ kind of drinker. But this evening I really had the urge to drink from a champagne flute because I was starting to miss it.
Knowing it may be a little over ambitious to think that I could trick my mind into thinking that, if drunk from a champagne flute, my Robinsons Fruit & Barley Orange squash (no added sugar) may seem like a suitable alternative to an alcoholic tipple, I dragged my sorry self out of the flat and ventured to our local Tesco Express in search of a Saturday night treat.
And there it was in prime position on the top shelf. Two varieties – one to represent white fizzy wine and one to represent the rose equivalent. I decided to go crazy and opt for the rose.
Back home I got out one of my favourite LSA champagne flutes (so trendy they were once queried by a male friend as “why am I drinking out of a vase?”) and poured my first ever glass of pink Schloer. And downed it in one.
Talk about boring, empty calaories. For an extra 20 I could have had a glass of champagne damn it. In fact, for 70 fewer I could have just had a glass of my Robinsons Fruit & Barley Orange squash (no added sugar).
So as I sat on the sofa inhaling the sweet scent of my flatmate’s glass of rouge, I ‘got on it’ Saturday night style with my fake rose. What a crazy chick I am!
It’s now midnight, I’m wide awake and watching the highlights of the Darts World Championships feeling reminiscent of being at Ally Pally just three weeks ago drinking warm wine from a plastic cup, wearing a Ladbrokes hat and waving my one-hundred-and-eighty poster with my self-penned caption on the back. Not sure I can imagine being there drinking Schloer.
Or maybe my willingness to participate in plastic-cupped wine and hat and banner activities is the whole reason I should wean myself off the pop?
So there we go. Four days down, including my first weekend. Just another 27 to go. TWENTY SEVEN! Maybe next year I’ll defer to February. At least then I would have fewer days of torture.
I can do this.